note to sweetactionpicks.com loyal readers: During the NFL off season, the writing staff at sweetactionpicks.com will be touching on a variety of topics. For the most part, our focus will be updating you on current fast food promotions and trends. In the meantime however, we would like to share an interesting current events article that describes just how tough these economic times have gotten.enjoy...
Local Man Leaves High Profile Finance Job to Become Low-Priced Male Prostitute
By Dick Pickles
sweetactionpicks.com
(New York) - In a move that analysts can only describe as stunning, area man Theodore Sawyer (pictured below, on a good day) recently left his job with a prominent financial institution to take his lesser known skill-set to the very place it was first honed. Yet another victim of economic downturn, Sawyer decided to take matters into his own hands.
While the management at Sawyer’s previous job was less than enthusiastic about his performance, citing “frequent visitation of non-work related internet sites and a visible desire to get fired,” Sawyer’s new supervisor has lauded his enthusiasm and attention to detail. Dr. Longfingers shares his praise of his newest employee, “Rainbow Tight [Sawyer] is everything you could ask for in a working girl. She’s got smarts, ambition, strong hands, and a never ending thirst to please the customer and always put him first. Don’t tell the other girls, but Tight is my best earner. It’s not everyday you can find someone that can pull off ‘The Dangling Bavarian’.” Dr. Longfingers then began to extol on Sawyer’s ability to actually perform two ‘Rusty Trombones’ simultaneously, but was forced to leave the interview prematurely in order to physically assault a grown man wearing a leather mini-skirt.
Although Sawyer seems to be enjoying his new position, he will be the first to admit there are some downsides in allowing himself to be repeatedly violated, both physically and psychologically, by wave after wave of filthy, possibly disease ridden, men. Sawyer shared his feelings about his new position at the mouth of a dimly lit alleyway, “You know, the first time I came to ass-up in a dumpster I was a little concerned. But daddy [Dr. Longfingers] told me it happens to everyone and to get back to work or no one would ever find my body. All in all it’s not that bad. Although the health insurance package is not what I’m generally used to.” At press time Sawyer hadn’t been seen for three days.
